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There’s a spot in your house you’ve been avoiding.
You know the one. You walk past it three or four times a day, something in your chest pulls tight, and you keep moving. Because there’s dinner to make and a lunchbox to pack and your little cutie needs a bath.
It’s been like that a while now.
If you’re wondering how to declutter when you feel overwhelmed, I want to take one thing off your plate before you read another word. You don’t have to fix the whole house right now, at this moment. You don’t need a free weekend, a truckload of matching bins, or a version of yourself who has it more together than the one standing in your kitchen reading this blog right now.
You just have to start where you’re stuck.
Where to start decluttering when everything feels like too much
When a client tells me she’s drowning and doesn’t know where to start, I don’t ask her which room is the messiest. I ask her which one makes her sigh when she walks in.
That’s the one.
Start with the space stressing you out the most, not the biggest or the worst. Set your timer for fifteen minutes and work only inside that space until it goes off. Fifteen minutes is short enough that you’ll actually start, and starting is often the hardest part.
Fifteen minutes. You can do anything for fifteen minutes.
What fifteen minutes actually looks like
So now you’ve got your timer set. Now what? Here’s a gentle framework for quickly getting through the organizing process in a small area with a small chunk of time. Ready? Let’s go!
G is for GATHER (about 3 minutes)
Pull out everything you can in three minutes. Yes, it looks worse before it looks better, and yes, this part is uncomfortable.
Then sort into categories. Like with like. Pens with pens, batteries with batteries, the handful of hair ties with the other hair ties.
Trust me, it’s nearly impossible to make a decision about something you can’t see. Now you can see it. All of it.
R is for RELEASE (about 5 minutes)
Now you get to decide what stays and what goes. Donate, sell, toss.
Here’s where I want to offer you some grace, because this is the step where most of us hit the breaks. You are not deciding whether you were right to buy it. You are not shameing yourself on the money you spent or the person you meant to become when you bought it.
I know that one from the inside. I have a master’s degree in theater, and I held onto my beloved theatre books long after I stopped acting. I loved those books and the person they helped me become.
I came to learn through my dear friend Glennda (Life Strategist and Relationship Coach) that releasing them wasn’t really about books. It was about admitting to myself that I’d been called somewhere else, and that shelves full of acting books and plays were never going to hold that door open for me.
I still love that season of my life. I don’t regret it at all. It’s just no longer who I am or where I’m called to be.
“The connection is not in the thing.”
Never heard that before? Let me tell you again, “The connection is not in the thing.” The connection to yourself, your loved one, and the memories are all within you and you can access them at anytime.
You’re only answering one question in this fast paced organizing session: does this belong in the life I’m living now?
A is for ACQUIRE (zero minutes today)
I know. This is the fun part, and for now skip it.
Do not go shopping. Do not pass go. Do not collect $100. Make a list instead of what you think you might need: one drawer divider, two small bins, a lazy Susan. Measure before you buy anything, and buy it later.
It’s easy to get sidetracked in this step. You stop organizing, you start browsing, and an hour later you’ve got a full cart on Amazon and the drawer and all its contents is still on the counter.
C is for CULTIVATE (about 4 minutes)
Put everything back with intention. Every item must have a home. Because when it doesn’t, it becomes a pile. And that pile becomes clutter.
Think about how you move in the space or how you want to move in the space and put things away accordingly.
Cultivate is a gardening word. It means “to tend, to grow.” Which means this isn’t a one-hour television makeover, it’s a dance you’re choreographing. And a new dance takes time to root.
E is for ENJOY (about 3 minutes)
Don’t skip this one.
Stand there and look at what you did. Open the drawer. Enjoy it. Close it. Open it again. Enjoy.
That’s not silly, that’s the whole point. You just made room in the one spot that’s been sitting heavy on you for weeks, and your brain needs to register the win so it will believe you the next time you say fifteen minutes is enough.
Decluttering with kids in the house
If you have kids, you already know that “we’re going to organize today!” lands about as well as announcing broccoli for dinner.
So here’s an idea that I learned from years of growing up in the church: model the life you believe in and what your kids to too.
My son is not quite two, and he is into everything. He opens every drawer. He pulls everything out of the cabinets. He puts my measuring cups somewhere new every single day.
I could lecture him about it, and he would understand exactly none of it. Or I can let him watch me put things back where they live, over and over, until that’s just what we do in my house.
Modeling beats lecturing. It’s slower and it holds.
Free download: 7 Tips For Keeping Your House Organized When You Have a Messy Family Seven tips that just might do the trick for helping you and your family. It’s free, it’s short, and it’s built for a real house with real people in it.
More on this: the Faith Mom Mentor podcast
I sat down with Anne Gurley on the Faith Mom Mentor podcast to talk about this exact thing: what to do when the clutter feels heavier than the clutter should feel, why it gets worse once school starts, and how to invite God into the process instead of white-knuckling your way through it.
We walked through all five G.R.A.C.E. steps, talked about why sentimental things are so hard to release, and got into how to bring your kids alongside you without starting a fight.
Start where you’re stuck
Fifteen minutes. One are where you’re stuck. Sometime between now and Sunday.
Not the whole house. Not a perfect system. Just the one place that makes you sigh when you walk in.
Which space in your home is it?
Frequently asked questions
How do you declutter when you feel completely overwhelmed?
Start with the one space causing you the most stress, not the biggest or the messiest. Set a timer for fifteen minutes and work only in that space. Fifteen minutes is short enough that you’ll actually start, and starting is the part most of us never get to.
What is the G.R.A.C.E. organizing method?
G.R.A.C.E. is my faith-based approach to getting organized: Gather, Release, Acquire, Cultivate, and Enjoy. It’s a gentler, prayer-friendly way to declutter that makes room for peace instead of pressure. I walk through all five steps in my book,Reclaim Your Space with G.R.A.C.E.
How do I get my kids to help without it turning into a fight?
Let them watch you first. Modeling works better than instructing, especially with little ones. Put things back where they live, out loud and often, until that’s simply what happens in your house. Give them one small job that’s genuinely theirs, and let it be imperfect.
What if fifteen minutes isn’t enough?
Sometimes it isn’t, and that’s not a failure on your part. Some spaces are too big, too emotional, or too tangled to untangle alone. If you’ve started and stalled more than once, that’s usually a sign you need a second pair of hands, not more willpower. You can always book a 1:1 session, in person or virtual.
Keep reading
- Summer of Gratitude: How Gratitude Helps Organizing
- You Don’t Have to Hustle Your Way Into God’s Will
- Reclaim Your Space with G.R.A.C.E., the book
Ready for help with the space that’s been stuck for longer than fifteen minutes can fix? Book a free discovery call.
What is the G.R.A.C.E. organizing method? G.R.A.C.E. is my faith-based approach to getting organized: Gather, Release, Acquire, Cultivate, and Enjoy. It’s a gentler, prayer-friendly way to declutter that makes room for peace, not pressure. I walk through all five steps in my book, Reclaim Your Space with G.R.A.C.E.
Where should you start when you feel completely overwhelmed? Start where you’re stuck. Close your eyes, walk through your home in your mind, and notice the space that makes you sigh. That’s your starting point. And if it feels like too much to do alone, it’s okay to ask for help. You can always book a 1:1 session with me, in person or virtual.
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